I just saw Twilight, the vampire movie based on the book series that’s been all the rage. I enjoyed it. There was a part in the movie that seemed so eerily familiar that I had to cull the script to share it with my fellow bloggers.
And if you’re not a blogger, just play along anyway. Quit lurking and GET IN THE GAME already. We don’t bite. Ha! I kill myself sometimes. (Ever said something that was only funny in your own head, but were really just groaners for everyone else? No? Wait – Don’t leave!)
Okay, here’s the script version of that strangely familiar part. Bella, the lead female and object of Edward the main vampire’s object of bloodlust, finally admits that she knows the truth about him and his vampire-ness.
Bella: You’re impossibly fast. And strong. Your skin is pale-white. Ice-cold. Your eyes change color. And sometimes you speak like…you’re from a different time. You never sleep, eat food, or drink, or come out in sunlight…
Edward: Say it. Say it out loud… SAY IT!
Bella: …BLOGGER.
Yeah – Such a revelation.
If there are any vampires on earth, I’d have to say Billy Idol. Can you think of anyone else we can Out? (Including relatives, politicians, CEOs and athletes?)
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20 kids playing along so far ↓
1 Chris
// Apr 13, 2009 at 2:34 am
My Uncle Bruce … definite Vampire. He’s always out look, looks as pale as pale gets and he’s always kissing his wife’s neck. I suspect she may have been his prey once upon a time.
And … as if that wasn’t enough evidence … they’re both very very grumpy in the mornings.
Chris’s last blog post..My guide to a healthy marriage
2 Jim @ CoolStuffForDads.com
// Apr 13, 2009 at 5:40 am
I am drawing a blank on possible vampires but George Hamilton and Jim Carrey vampire movies came to mind as I read this…
3 ReformingGeek
// Apr 13, 2009 at 6:48 am
My last boss had to be a vampire. She sucked the life out of our entire team.
ReformingGeek’s last blog post..Do Re Mi Mi Mi Mi…
4 grannyann
// Apr 13, 2009 at 8:25 am
Aw-schucks I can’t think of anyone who I can out.
grannyann’s last blog post..Dear Mr President
5 Shawn
// Apr 13, 2009 at 9:32 am
I’m pretty convinced that Amy Winehouse is a vampire. How else could she still be walking around?
Shawn’s last blog post..The Beautiful, Tragic Life of Mossman
6 marissa
// Apr 13, 2009 at 1:17 pm
Chris: Definite signs of Vampire. I’d wear a neck brace around Uncle Bruce.
Jim: I haven’t seen either Love at First Bite or Once Bitten. But some actors are definitely meant for such roles.
ReformingGeek: YES – bosses for sure. I’ve always wanted to drive a stake through certain bosses’ hearts. Problem is, they don’t have ‘em.
Grannyann: Maybe Enid, OK, is fresh out of them.
Shawn: Amy Winehouse – absolutely a Vampire! What about Keith Richards? Is he a werewolf?
7 Otin
// Apr 13, 2009 at 4:34 pm
Yea, I say crap all the time that is funny to me, but alot of people don’t get my sense of humor. A friend on facebook posted that she was having a cold one, so I replied “I didn’t know you were a necrophiliac”?, to which I got no response. I think maybe Jack White might be a vampire. Its like a Jeff Foxworthy routine, “If your skin is whiter than Michael Jackson’s……You might be a vampire”!
Otin’s last blog post..Dear Ab, oops I Mean OTIN!
8 marissa
// Apr 13, 2009 at 5:10 pm
Otin: “Necrophiliac.” lol. I’ve also posted stuff on FB and people think I’m serious. And these are supposedly my Friends. Gimme a break.
Jack White is totally Vampire material. I wish MJ was still black.
9 alantru
// Apr 13, 2009 at 5:57 pm
I think Dracula was a vampire… But I can’t be sure. Maybe he was more of swinger poet type with sharp teeth, a penchant for blood, a really cool cape (not many dudes can pull off a cape) and an aversion to sunlight. Hmm, not sure. Let me get back to you on this…
alantru’s last blog post..Lobbing Softballs
10 Otin
// Apr 13, 2009 at 7:38 pm
I didn’t realize that you were my age LMAO, I saw your picture and thought I was about 15 years older than you. Maybe you are a vampire, frozen at a certain age, never growing old. Damned Anne Rice, I ‘ve seen Interview with a Vampire too many times!
Otin’s last blog post..I’ll have a BLT!
11 marissa
// Apr 13, 2009 at 8:09 pm
Otin: So… we’re both 27 right? (nod your head enthusiastically)
If I had to be a vampire, I’d like to be Elvira, Mistress of the Dark. Although, I DO like to nap alot during the day. I’ve had my teeth fixed, mostly crowns. I’m into meat. But I’m definitely not pale, not even in winter. But you’re right – I’ll NEVER grow old. *checks mirror, curses gray hair*
12 marissa
// Apr 13, 2009 at 9:02 pm
Alantru: Yeah, I think Dracula was just trying to be Goth, but couldn’t quite pull it off because of that weird accent: “I vont to drrink yourr blood!”
13 alantru
// Apr 13, 2009 at 9:54 pm
Yeah, those thick, weird accents always get in a vampire’s way!
alantru’s last blog post..Lobbing Softballs
14 Bee
// Apr 14, 2009 at 9:13 am
If I’m outing anybody as anything it’s Joaquin Phoenix as a disoriented werewolf. ;o)
Bee’s last blog post..The germs- the germs- the germs are on fire!
15 Otin
// Apr 14, 2009 at 3:10 pm
I think O.J. Simpson is a vampire, I just think he was kind of a sloppy eater. Also, some of my family members are vampires, because they tend to suck the life out of me. I was going to have the crew work naked today, just to accomodate your request, but we were working in a wooded area, and I didn’t feel like hangin’ out (Literally) with a group of naked men.
Otin’s last blog post..Random Tuesday Thoughts #1
16 marissa
// Apr 14, 2009 at 5:26 pm
Bee: Joaquin is a werewolf in search of his inner rapper.
Otin: LOL. OJ ate with gusto. And relatives can also suck our bank accounts dry.
Thanks for the thought. You guys could’ve done a sweat lodge ceremony.
17 The Stabbing Pen
// Apr 14, 2009 at 6:27 pm
Old college professor —
http://www.pointcontact.org/golem25.jpg
guy on the right.
The Stabbing Pen’s last blog post..4/13 – “Mos Def sounds like/is an idiot”
18 marissa
// Apr 14, 2009 at 6:37 pm
Stabbing Pen: Lol. Also could be Uncle Fester.
19 Pen Whitening
// Aug 17, 2009 at 3:42 pm
Well, I also second the vote for Amy Winehouse as a vampire. Until recently, I would also have included Dick Clark on that list because he never seemed to age and would only come out of his coffin for New Year’s Eve.
20 marissa
// Aug 30, 2009 at 6:09 pm
Pen Whitening:
LOL! Dick Clark is so, um, well-preserved. There’s so much comparison between him and Ryan Seacrest nowadays. Now Ryan would make a beautiful metro vampire.
Thanks for commenting!
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