It’s Sunday again, which means I’m back at work tomorrow, unless I get really sick (cough) or something. Maybe I should roll around a gas station bathroom floor. But that’ll give me syphilis when I’m actually shootin’ for just a sinus headache. Something that gets me the day off, but would realistically allow me to pop some low-level meds and still be able to righteously enjoy the day.
Well, at least that’s how I’d explain my miraculous recovery, just in case I run into someone from work when I’m at Six Flags on the rollercoaster. Or sunbathing at the beach. You know, sunlight stimulates production of Vitamin D, which makes me healthier so I could go back to work the next day, energetic with a tan. That’s me - a model employee.
As I’ve mentioned before, I just hate being at a job when there are so many more appealing places to be and things to do. That’s what so tough about living near the coast, so many damn beaches everywhere you turn. Couldn’t they put the beaches where they’re really needed, like the desert with all that pre-delivered sand?
How about in Iraq? If they had California-type beaches in Baghdad, that war would be sooo over. And all the factions would get together with a BBQ (no pork) and listen to the Beach Boys all day. Women would be in burka swimsuits or full body wetsuits, which conveniently eliminates the need for sunscreen. The men would turn their turbans into beach towels. They’d ride around in dune buggies instead of car bombs. We’re talking Baywatch mecca. Life could be so good if there was a Malili-bubu (Malibu) Beach in Baghdad. Oh yeah, I’m feeling the good vibrations already…
Beach Boys - Good Vibrations
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24 kids playing along so far ↓
1 Chris
// May 3, 2009 at 2:58 am
Totally agree. And plus, any country with a beach has never gone to war. Well … the haven’t started one.
Actually, I’m not sure about that but I wouldn’t imagine any beachside communities waking up one day and thinking “Right kids, we’re not going to the beach today for some fun, we’re going to start a war”
Doesn’t seem right does it?
Chris’s last blog post..Chris’ break time
2 Otin
// May 3, 2009 at 7:29 am
(Tune of surfin usa) If Bin Laden had an ocean
Just like the USA
He’d probably kill bathers
and blow surfers away
All over the mid east
and pakistan too
Crazy taliban Loonies
Surfin’ Baghdad bay
Otin’s last blog post..Breaker 19! (if you want to hear the song, turn the music player off at the bottom of the blog)
3 ReformingGeek
// May 3, 2009 at 8:25 am
Malili-Bubu? I love it but I think it might be lost on folks hell bent to be terrorists. Very sad.
It’s rainy here and a bit cooler so those beach photos made me feel good. I’ll try to imagine I’m on the beach while I’m out running this morning.
ReformingGeek’s last blog post..H1N1 Snarcastic Mini-Rant
4 Joe
// May 3, 2009 at 1:11 pm
When I was a teenager and was living in florida, my folks would leave for a few days at a time during the school season. On those days I’d skip school and take the moped to the beach.
I was so damn irresponsible… so much that if i had to do it all over again, I’d do the same thing… I’m just that way.
5 Otin
// May 3, 2009 at 2:17 pm
LMAO! at reforming Geeks Mali bubu! Imagine the clothes for Mali-bubu barbie, all you would be able to see is her eyes, and then Ken would be strapped with explosive devices. Is this racial profiling? I don’t know but I am laughing, therefore it is O.K.!
Otin’s last blog post..Sunday funny pictures
6 marissa
// May 3, 2009 at 5:42 pm
Chris: LOL - Yeah, let’s use those shovels and pails for digging trenches and foxholes. Incoming!!
Otin: You are too funny! Liked the lyrics. That was fun last night in your chatroom. Jaime’s cool.
ReformingGeek: I took those larger pictures at my favorite beach here in Ventura County (umbrella was stock photo). Always peaceful, never crowded or dirty. But for any readers thinking about invading my beach: It’s awful, you don’t want to come near it, EVER.
Joe: Same here! Ditched school and went to Santa Monica beach every few months. I’m with you, I’d do it all over again. Probably more often. (sigh) Those were good days…
See what I mean, about the beach beckoning people away from their responsibilities. Is their a lake near you? If I were far inland, I’d find a lake and play hooky there.
Otin: LMAO! I could picture what you’re saying and it’s funny. You know what happened last time on This Ain’t No Effin Mom Blog!
BTW - one of my favorite movies is Team America.
7 marissa
// May 3, 2009 at 5:45 pm
I don’t know why I ALWAYS misspell these 3 words every time: (see my comment to Joe, I guess 2 out of 3 correct ain’t bad)
their, they’re, and there! Damn! Or is it Dam?
8 grannyann
// May 3, 2009 at 6:32 pm
at Mali-bubu they can sit and play beach burka bingo
grannyann’s last blog post..Caption this Post #2
9 Otin
// May 3, 2009 at 7:15 pm
I think that the Mali-bubu thing is taking off. Maybe instead of a barbie playhouse, they could have a Malibubu Barbie 7-11 store!
Otin’s last blog post..Sunday funny pictures
10 marissa
// May 3, 2009 at 9:06 pm
GrannyAnn: HAHA! I like it!
Otin: LOL - you’re bad.
11 Old School
// May 4, 2009 at 7:10 am
I dread Mondays as well. I totally agree with you when you say “I just hate being at a job when there are so many more appealing places to be and things to do. ” The problem I have is that I would almost rather be doing anything else other than working.
Have a good week!
Old School’s last blog post..Back to the 80s: Top 10 Songs from the 80s with the word ‘UP’ in the Title - Kickin’ it Old School
12 Shawn
// May 4, 2009 at 11:29 am
Agreed with Old School. It doesn’t have to be the beach to make me not want to go to work. It could be the park, the TV, Target, mowing the lawn, or getting my eyes pecked out by a thousand crows.
Shawn’s last blog post..Humor Writer Needed
13 marissa
// May 4, 2009 at 1:55 pm
Old School: It’s the same for me. I just wish I was doing something more meaningful - for myself or my goals, instead of for my employer. But I guess, since they insist on paying me every 2 weeks, I ‘ll keep coming in.
Shawn: LOL. I too might rather have my eyes pecked out than go to work, but if it weren’t for my job that pays my medical insurance, I wouldn’t be able to get new bionic eyes. It’s a Catch-22.
14 Betty
// May 4, 2009 at 3:36 pm
I don’t know, I think they might also enjoy a little sanitation and a camp fire sing along.
Betty’s last blog post..The family hierarchy
15 marissa
// May 4, 2009 at 9:29 pm
Betty: I like to imagine that Malili-Bubu Beach has outdoor showers. I wonder if that campfire song would be like Otin’s version of Surfin USA (above).
16 alantru
// May 4, 2009 at 10:13 pm
You were wise to hold off on rolling around on a gas station bathroom floor.
You were wise to hold off on rolling around on a gas station bathroom floor.
The first time I did I got a terrible rash
The second time, that syphilis deal you mentioned.
The third time I woke up in a hospital. Apparently, I almost died. I vowed that wouldn’t happen.
The fourth time – same results as the third.
The fifth time I only got nauseous for a week.
I think I’ll have better results on my 6th try.
alantru’s last blog post..The Death of Soul-Sucking Spirit
17 marissa
// May 5, 2009 at 6:45 am
LOL. It’s just like they say, the 6th time is the charm. Maybe if you try LICKING the bathroom floor. That might do the trick!
18 The Stabbing Pen
// May 5, 2009 at 2:53 pm
I’m not certain more beaches is the answer to strife. It’s probably legalized and regulated prostitution in repressed theocratic societies. Some of the worlds bloodiest battles probably have taken place in countless coastal cities. Nevertheless, I agree…more fun beaches wouldn’t hurt with our long term goals for peace.
The Stabbing Pen’s last blog post..5/4 - “Is the Dirty Sanchez is out of style?”
19 The Stabbing Pen
// May 5, 2009 at 2:55 pm
I mean prostitution helps bring about peace. It’s been scientifically proven.
The Stabbing Pen’s last blog post..5/4 - “Is the Dirty Sanchez is out of style?”
20 marissa
// May 5, 2009 at 3:06 pm
Stabbing Pen: HAhaha. EXCEPT in a marriage. I imagine (although I COULD be wrong) that prostitution would bring more strife. Could be a good social experiment.
21 Rich
// May 9, 2009 at 9:40 am
I went to the guitar store and after bit my nails. A habit I have but believe it or not I am down to only bitting my pinky’s, or is it pinkies? (I need them to play actually.) Anyway I got a low grade cold. However I did not realize the cause and effect, the guitar shop nail bitting relationship. A few months go by and the same thing, play ‘public guitars’, bite my nails and get a mild cold.
Now if you don’t play guitar I would think holding an escalator rail and biting your nails would work.
BTW, I suck at guitar but it goes with the spitit of this site, stay young. I started when I hit 40 and the years started to hit back.
Rich’s last blog post..Caught in the rain?
22 marissa
// May 9, 2009 at 11:12 pm
Rich: Okay, so if I go to try out some guitars and bite my nails, I might get a pass to get out of work. Do I have to play something to make this “magic” work reliably, such as Stairway to Heaven?
As for getting the right amount of germs to get sick, it’s tricky, because, the point is to stay young and alive, not get sick to get out of work - but accidentally die.
Hey, I thought you played classical guitar!
23 Rich
// May 10, 2009 at 7:00 am
Under no circumstances do you ever play “Stairway to Heaven” in a guitar store. It is an unwritten law punishable by death or at least severe humiliation. Maybe play ‘Black Magic Woman.”
As for me, I am just a beginner. I do go see a lot of guitar music. I love classical guitar! My forte is acoustic blues. Just another interest that I have no time for. Like brushing my teeth…. just kidding!
Rich’s last blog post..Caught in the rain?
24 marissa
// May 10, 2009 at 8:16 am
Rich: LOL! Yeah, showering cuts into too much of my time too.
Black Magic Woman always reminds me of the time in the 70’s when I gave my sister a hard-earned dollar to buy me a 45 record when she stopped at a record store.
I told her just to get me anything (expecting a pop-type song) and she got me that one. At the time I didn’t like it and was really disappointed. Why, why couldn’t she get me something by Shaun Cassidy?!!
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